[This is the paper that I wrote for my World Religions class. The prompt was open ended, so I decided that it was okay to be a bit more "creative."]
I sat looking at my computer for a while thinking of possible titles for this paper. Nothing really seemed to fit. “How Cathy Bingman and her World Religions Class Liberated me from the Confines of a Narrow World View” seemed too long and “How I Became a Hindu Christian attempting to live a more Buddhist Life” sounded too much like an elementary-school presentation with big words. Though rudimentary it may be, I settled on “My Journey” because that is exactly what this is. Here I am going to present my struggles, my questions and my journey through them all— also known as life.
Following Julie Andrew’s lead, I am going to start at the very beginning. (because not only is it “a very good place to start” but it is the necessary precursor to My Journey)
Once upon a time, in 7th grade room 101, Barbara Lee Danforth met Charles “Chuck” David Osburn. Having just moved from Mexico City, Barbara, dressed in her big T-shirts and frilly socks, did not exactly fit it. Seventh graders, as per their stereotypes, were far from accepting. Except Chuck. He was Barbara’s first friend in Pennsylvania. Ten years later they were married. Nineteen years later Kendra was born.
Thing to Consider Number One: It was Christmas break after my freshman year of college and my mother and I were having our (now traditional) tea. I remember asking her why she and my dad did not have more “date nights.” [When I was living at home it was sometimes hard for me that I was always the center of attention. I was convinced that had they done more “them” things this would not have been the case] My mom responded, “Kendra, we had 19 years of Friday Night Dates.” It was then that I realized that, due to problems with infertility, I was the product of 19 years of waiting. This means that I am very, very loved.
Barbara and Chuck Osburn raised Kendra with a lot of love. They wanted to be the best parents possible so they read multiple books all with titles like “Dads and their Daughters: How to do it right!” and brought her up in the Church where Chuck worked as a Pastor.
Thing to Consider Number Two: My dad is a pastor. [I am aware of the stereotypes that come with being “a pastors child” and I would like to think that I break them all. I am not like Mandy Moore in Saved and I am not the rebel child who wears only black. I did have my “issues” and I did wear a lot of eyeliner at one point, but I also spent one summer working back at that same Church and I have spoken there on a few different occasions (my dad and I actually both gave “sermons” on The Fruits of the Spirit!)] But because of this, I had/have a lot of questions about faith. Is faith something I inherited from my family? Do I actually believe this on my own? If I were born into a different family, would I have different beliefs?
Kendra grew up and continued to lead a very charmed life filled with lots of love. Eventually she went to college at the University of San Diego and took some classes that challenged some of her beliefs.
Thing to Consider Number Three: At USD, I began doing something very appropriate for a college student—I began to reevaluate my beliefs. I took religion classes, philosophy classes and sociology classes that forced me to reconsider what I had come to consider as “my world view.” At this point in my life every time I opened my mouth, questions came out. No one had answers. I felt very alone. Where was God amongst the hurricanes and homelessness? The strong base that my parents had helped me form in youth groups, bible studies and church camps started to feel less stable.
Kendra, disarmed by questions but still looking for answers signed up to study abroad in Madrid, Spain. She enrolled in World Religions to fulfill her final Theology and Religious Studies requirement. Going into World Religions, Kendra expected to learn about the Religions of the World. What she did not expect was to come out of the class a completely different person.
How this course has changed my “world view:”
As previously mentioned, before this course I had a fairly narrow “world view.” I was very blessed to be born into the small but affluent town of La Canada, California, but I grew up fairly ignorant of other cultures and different “world views.” I used to believe in right and wrong ways, and that my way was in fact the right way. Maybe I missed that day in preschool where we realized that our conviction alone was not enough to prove the validity of our beliefs, but now, after studying multiple religions, it is so clear to me that there is no one “right way.”
My “world view” was first challenged on Day One when Professora Bingman read to us from Eastern Wisdom for Western Minds. I realized that I really resonated with the Hindu faith. I love how the Hindu tradition acknowledges the differences in people. I love how, instead of trying to change people, the Hindu tradition workes with people exactly where they were in life. For example, “if pleasure is what you seek, seek it.” When adopting this world view, it makes it easier to love and accept those that are harder to love and accept.
{Anecdote: One evening out at a bar here in Madrid, a young man [who we will call Al] was not that kind to me. Two nights later, we ran into one another again and he (a little more intoxicated this time) was trying to apologize for his rudeness the previous evening. I smiled and laughed it off and within minutes Al and I were friends. My other friend [we will call him Paul] who knew about the first evening was confused why I had so quickly forgotten about Al’s rudeness. I explained to Paul that we all needed to be a little more like the Hindus and meet people where they were. Al clearly sought pleasure. I have faith that one day his pleasure seeking will no longer fulfill him, at which point he will leave the Path of Desire and turn to the Path of Renunciation and hopefully, eventually end at Moksha. I cannot say whether this will happen in this life or the next, or even the one after that, but I have faith that one day his dedication to himself will cease to satiate and then, he will begin his search for true joy.}
I also love how Hindus focus so much on yoga (literally meaning: to yolk, as in to yolk with God) and meditation. As yoga (albeit the less Hindu more fashionable kind) is already a huge part of my life, the knowledge that the origin and purpose of yoga practice is to bring us closer to God (another huge part of my life) made yoga (and the Hindu tradition) that much more meaningful and powerful.
There were two other facets of Hinduism that really impacted me. First, the belief in Karma. I am not sure exactly how much I believe in Karma, however, I have found myself trying just a little bit harder to go out of my way for others, keeping “what goes around comes around” in the back of my mind. I understand that this opens up the “altruism” debate which we don’t really have time for, but I believe that if it karma is helping me to love others a little bit better (even if it is mildly rooted in selfishness), it is a good thing. Secondly, the idea of Dharma [the understanding that everyone is searching for meaning] could very easily serve as a working definition for My Journey.
Lastly, the thing about Hinduism that continues to impress me is how they accept and often adopt other religions. As we learned about other religions (and talked a little bit about cults and sects) it became fairly clear to me that Hinduism, though not seen as a monotheistic religion, was often more monotheistic than some of the “monotheistic” cults. The way I understand it, Hindus use Ishtas (visual representations) to help them focus their concentration on God. How is this different from Jesus? We, as humans, are limited by our three dimensions. We think in tangible terms. It makes sense that we cannot really understand God, as he is not human. Christians look to Jesus to help bridge this human, non-human gap between God and man. While I recognize that there is a lot more to Jesus and the Christian tradition than I just gave credit for (namely that Jesus is fully human and fully divine), I think it is inappropriate to suggest that the Hindu tradition is as different as westerners often believe. In addition, protestant denominations provide a similar service. In the same way that Hindus go to Ishtas to help them channel their faith, protestants often choose a denomination that speaks to them and helps them understand God just a little bit better. For me, Jesus is my Ishta. Jesus helps me to focus on, and understand God. For other Hindus, they have different Ishtas, but all of the Ishtas lead to the same God.
My world view continued to change as we talked about Buddhism. I have loved going to this class every single Monday and Wednesday of the semester but I especially loved the classes about Buddhism. When learning about Buddhism, I felt like I was in the best kind of “Self-Help” seminar. Everything made sense. I continue to return to “pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional” whenever I am having a bad day or rough time. I love that we should “treat our thoughts as visitors” – some are welcome, some are not. I love that Buddhism preaches metacognition, self-reflection and “the path of the middle way” (not living in the extremes).
Buddhism, through addressing and explaining The Four Noble Truths- Dukkha (suffering), Tanha (causes of suffering), Overcoming Tanha (we must move beyond our narrow limits of our self interest), Right Association (you become the company that you keep) and The 8 Fold Path (Right Knowledge: knowledge and view that keep you on track, for example “Love other as best as you can”, Right Thinking: think loving thoughts, Right Speech: cultivating loving speech and deep listening skills, Right Behavior: don’t kill/steal/lie etc., Right Occupation: if your job is an impediment to your spiritual progress, don’t do it, Right Effort: “effort is more important than intelligence,” Right Mindfulness: learning to master oneself, “think lovely thoughts” → “when our emotions are stronger than our minds, we suffer,” Right Concentration: obtaining an emotional middle way) provides you with tangible tools to be the most loving person you can be.
How I am different as a result of this “journey:”
I believe that faith is like a trip to the Grocery store. Hypothetically speaking, we all want to get to Whole Foods. We have an intense desire to go to Whole Foods because we are hungry and we need food. I choose to go to Whole Foods in a Toyota Rav4. My dad chooses to go to Whole Foods in a Toyota as well, but it is a different make and model. I have classmates that take Hondas and a few that go by foot. There are also people that take the bus – or buses. In the end, our destination is the same. We all want to get to the grocery store.
After taking this class, it is clear to me that we (those that consider themselves to be religious) are all on our way to the same destination. We all want to find our way to God. It does not matter that we all choose different methods of getting there—in fact this further highlights how beautiful it is that we are all different! (To quote a favorite song—“If everybody looked the same, we would get tired of looking at each other”) What matters is that we are all searching for God.
When I was younger, I was always told not to “put God in a box.” I did not really understand what that meant until this class. In suggesting that God created only one way to Him, we are limiting His power; we are “putting Him in a box”. According to most religions, God is omnipotent, meaning his power is not limited, meaning He should not be put in any box.
After studying Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam, Judaism and Christianity my world view changed, and grew exponentially. My questions about faith changed from “What is the right way” to “Why does religion have to be mutually exclusive?!” Do I have to commit to just one faith tradition? If God is so great, why would he have only created one path to get to Him? I still don’t have the answers to these questions, but I have become much more comfortable with the questions themselves. This class vindicated me from my need to be right. This class taught me that questions are okay and struggling is beautiful.
In the beginning of this digression I mentioned my parents. It was important to mention them because A. They are two of the most wonderful humans I know and B. they helped to shape my “world view.” They both identify very deeply with the Christian tradition and this makes complete sense. When looking at the generations in which they were born, the places they grew up in and most importantly, the families they grew into, it makes perfect sense why they identify with the faith tradition that they do. And it makes perfect sense why they raised me in their tradition - they love me just that much. I am very thankful.
I was very blessed to be born into this loving and accepting family, and I essentially have been gifted with the resources to question and choose for myself. Initially, when I took this course, I was tempted to use my newfound liberation to make others see things my new way. I fell back into “this is the right way (opening yourself up to all religions) and that is the wrong way (choosing one to identify with)” but as we have seen above, this is never the best rout. This is not meeting people where they are. This is not being loving or understanding.
As seen above, not only has this course helped to shape me spiritually, but it has also helped to shape me personally. Part of my Dharma includes being the most loving and understanding person that I can be. Through this class I believe that I have come full circle and have learned how to be more accepting and more understanding. {However I am, and always will be, a work in progress} In the same way that I hope people will love and understand me for the person that I am, in The Journey that I am on, I hope to love and accept and understand them for the people that they are, in The Journey that they have chosen.
Right now I consider myself to be a “Christian [because this continues to resonate with me the most after studying the different religions]/Hindu who attempts to incorporate as much of The 8 Fold Path and the Buddhist tradition into her life as she can.” But do I really need a label? Who is asking? Who really matters? Or, as my dad likes to ask me, “Kendra, what is the most important thing?” And the answer is always God. God is the most important thing. So does it really matter how we get to God? At the end of the day, isn’t it about you and God, not right versus wrong? “Kendra, what is the most important thing?” God. The answer is always God.
And Kendra lived joyfully ever after on Her Journey through life and faith.
This is not the end.
No comments:
Post a Comment